The Happy and Prosperous Blog

Yesterday we looked a people’s attitude towards money. Today I would like to talk a little bit about worry. Some of this was inspired by the CDs I mentioned a couple of days ago, in the article called a Virtuous Spiral. My friend, Gavin, sent me the CD set by Richard Wilkins. Richard has written a number of excellent books about what he has learned from the challenges in his life and how we can apply those ideas to our lives.

Worry

So, what do you worry about ? Money, health, work, kids behaviour, whether you’ll be made redundant, stock market falls, the gossip that is going round about you, what people will think, the state of the world, pollution, politics. The list could go on and on.

Worry that goes on and on can make people ill. We all know that stress is a big factor in a lot of illness and unrelenting worry can be very stressful.

I think it is useful to try to classify the things I worry about into 2 categories

1. Those things I can change or influence significantly
2. Those that I can’t change and don’t have any influence over.

Taking the second category…if I can change or influence that thing, then, logically, there is no point me worrying about it. I can’t change it so, I can let it go. Easy to say, I know because this is just looking at it logically, but if you could let go of these things emotionally too, then you would have less to worry about.

So, say for instance you were worrying about some gossip that was going round about you. There may be nothing you can do about this. You can’t stop it. You know that it’s not true. However, there may be nothing you can do. To carry on worrying about it is not going to change it. You are putting energy into worrying and you are getting nothing back from it.

Affect and Effect

Now the trick here is that you can’t always change the things that affect you (like the gossip) but you can change the effect it has on you. The effect it has on you is up to you. It’s your choice. You may say that your natural reaction is to worry about it or to get angry or to get stressed or whatever. The honest truth is that you can change that. You have options, you have control over how you react. It would be much more healthy for you (and those around you) if you opted for a more positive reaction. In the matter of the gossip, you may chose to believe that it will separate your true friends from others, for instance, and that would be a positive thing.

So, please bear this in mind. There are lots of things in the world that come along and affect us and we have no choice in the matter. However, we do have choice in how we respond to those things. Reduce your worry and your stress, and chose a positive response.

By the way, going back to category number 1 above, here, I think, the issue is to decide what to do. In these matters you do have influence and can make changes. So here too, you can reduce your worries by deciding on a course of action and making a start.

Yes, I know all this sounds good in theory and is not always easy to put into practice, however, with practice, it gets easier. That’s been my experience anyway.

Thanks for reading.

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